Potholes

If you've ever taken a trip through the Rift Valley on your way to Maasai Mara, or even if you've just encountered a crappy interstate in the US, then you may understand how irritating a bumpy ride can be. In Kenya, potholes exist because the road engineering isn't quite right yet and the water just stands on the roads and eventually eats into the asphalt. In the US, sometimes the pavement is just uneven and makes a grinding noise when you drive over it. Regardless, the ride just isn't as smooth as we'd like it to be, and sometimes you have no other choice...the other lane is blocked, or in the case of Kenya, there is no other way to get there except by plane.

That's a little bit how things are for me right now. Getting things in line for my Visa have been a little bit more wrenching than I (or anyone, I think) had expected. Not that I haven't put forth the effort...trust me...I've spent the past 2 and a half weeks working on getting one specific piece of paper so that my Visa for South Africa can be processed. And, it's been frustrating. At times, just uneven and a little grinding noise in the background. At other times, like the potholes...almost nauseating for those of us who get motion sickness. There have been some tears, because really what I need right now is completely out of my hands and I've done everything I could possibly think of. I am having to depend on other people to do what they say they will in order to have what I need, and that's humbling and for those of us who value independence so much, frustrating.

I think the comfort in this, though, is that God is our refuge and our strength. He never promised us the ride wouldn't get bumpy, He just said He'd be with us. Yes, it's a silly piece of paper, but it matters to Him because it matters to me. That may sound selfish, but God is clear in His Word that we are on His mind constantly. That's why He came to the cradle, to the cross, and rose again for us. Also, I KNOW that God has called me to South Africa for the next 5 months, so that's another reason that it is frustrating to me. But perhaps there is a lesson for me in all of this. I know there is...I know that "in Him, all things hold together," even if to us it seems like there are gaping holes in the tapestry. I just can't see the beauty in all of this yet.

What I need to be focusing on instead of my personal frustrations is probably God's MANY MANY frustrations with me. I know I must drive Him crazy sometimes the way I think and the way I handle things. The beauty here is that He has still called me and that He is still preparing me and equipping me for what's ahead. I know He loves me, I am His daughter, His princess, and His treasure. I can't fathom why, but I know that and need to act like that, too.

As my flight is barely two weeks away at this point, I'll probably start packing soon...making smal last minute purchases to take with me (lots of ChapStick probably!) and writing goodbye letters to people who mean the most to me. I am about to embark on a plane, but more than that a huge challenge that at this point, I can barely hope I am ready for. But as Miles reminded me that I reminded Him (funny how that works), God equips the called...not necessarily the other way around.

IN HIM ALL THINGS HOLD TOGETHER.