Yeah we do, yeah we do,
We live in a beautiful world
-Coldplay
Our world. It's beautiful.
God's just put so many wonderful things in our view,
in our hands...what amazing blessings even in the midst
of despair...of the death of a friend...heartache...
and in the midst of so much sin that is ugly.
Unfortunately, I contribute to that ugliness. My heart does,
so often. Like the author of Blue Like Jazz, Donald Miller,
says, I AM THE PROBLEM. I need to have that written on my
forehead in green sharpie or something--! But instead I think
I'd want to be reminded of God's GRACE and LOVE, not my inadequacy
and stubbornness and flaw.
Look at some of the amazing things God gives us though.
Look at the love in your life. Not "romantic" love.
The love in the body of Christ, the love in your family,
the love in friendships. It's way too amazing, and I am so
undeserving of these friends, my family, and most of all of
the Love of Christ.
When we least expect it, and when we need it most, God sends someone
into our lives to wrap their arms around us in the hard times.
And right now I just need to be thankful that He cares about the times
when I lie facedown on the floor...that He hears me--that He comforts me.
Even so, I AM THE PROBLEM. I am healed though. It's not about my problems--
it's about Him. It's about His healing, HIS GLORY. Gosh if He hasn't told me that a million times in the past week. Sometimes, though, it's hard to see how some things can glorify Him.
LOVE--
in reading today I found some very key things about love.
What love really is:
*sincere*patient*protecting*
What love really isn't:
*harmful*self-seeking*fearful*
My view of love=skewed. It's not about me. It's sincere, not a flippant thing. It's patient, not greedy and self-serving. It doesn't hurt--there is no room for that in love. There is no fear. No being scared about the future.
Hand it up. He shows us real love. Even when we believe the world again.
NO MA'AM. GOD IS LOVE. LOVE IS GOD. "Love" outside of that is...nothing.
May He jerk my focus off of myself and my problems, and teach me (again!) how to care about others and to LOVE them in the right ways--with no attachment.
I am so unworthy.
But I must do what He calls me to do.
Even when I don't feel like it.
I thank Him for being my only source of peace.
enamored, blessed, and undeserving--
-amanda
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